Friday, June 20, 2008

Incompetent Advice: Can We Find a Man for Lemmonex?


Darling Shannon:

Not to fan the fire of a million angry men, but I have a half serious/half joking question for you.

I have been reminded on several occasions that time, it is a ticking away. Time for me to find a man, make some babies. Where do I find these men? For reals? I am not a bad catch; have half a brain in my head, can string together coherent thoughts, will watch baseball games, cook, sexually adventurous, very soft hair, my breasts are like whoa...NO MAN. I admit, in the past, to some fairly self defeating behavior when it comes to boys, but I think I am almost there. Must snatch man, eggs slowly dying, youth fading fast...

Thanks for any insights...Lem

No one told you? Lemmonex, you petulant feminist ho, you can merely pull a husband out of your back pocket once you’re good and ready to lead a life of proper subservience and baby-popping.

Kidding aside, I have no idea why some people are single, and others are not. It's so random, and dating, love and marriage are things we actually have very little control over. A lasting relationship comes from timing, luck, chemistry, compatibility, communication, respect, humor, and affection. Those first three hurdles are the toughest: timing, luck and chemistry (yup, T.L.C....barf), and those are also the things you can’t control. Neat, huh? But you can be open to the experience and see what happens next.

So the thing to do is up the quality and quantity of the men you meet. Most advice columnists will tell you to volunteer, take classes, join a church, run up to random men in museums and lick them, etc. Bah. You want a man, not a radical lifestyle shift…correct?

So I’m going to suggest you turn to the Internet. I hereby dare you to post a personals ad on Craigslist (I know, I know…but really, as my dear friend pointed out, Craigslist works sort like Boyfriend Netflix). I’ll be happy to proof your ad and will even help you sift through the inevitable weenie pictures and bad poetry.
Be yourself, throw in a few facts that might be deal-breakers to the wrong guys, and let the right guys select themselves. I'd even say something about how you have baggage...because a man who claims he wants a woman with "no baggage" pretty much wants a blank slate with boobies, not a complex woman who's taken risks and lived a full life.

Or maybe one of my fabulous commenters will take you out for a coffee. Guys? Hello?
And does anyone else have advice, ideas, words of encouragement, etc? (Though please remember actual humans with feelings are involved here, vs. mythical Internet sprites, so please think twice, post once, and keep it respectful.)

PS: I know you’re kidding, but I’d be very careful about the hollering biological clock stuff. Committing to someone out of fear, rather than love, will fall apart in the end and leave you in a worse place then where you began. Live life at your own pace, and tune out the noise.

91 comments:

Lemmonex said...

Yes, kidding re: biological clock, but you make an excellent point.

Wow. Craig's List. This is what it has come to.

Thanks Shannon, you are a peach. And all weenie pics are being sent to you.

Shannon said...

Don't knock Craigslist. That's how I met my boyfriend, and got my job, and sold a bunch of crap. If it wasn't for Craig, I'd be unemployed, single, and surrounded by Apple IIGS and dot matrix printer parts.

Lemmonex said...

I know, I know! The internet scares me, which is weird seeing as I have a blog, but whatever. I have plenty of friends who met guys on CL.

Anonymous said...

1) Don't joke about a biological clock EVAR.

2) Stop referring to men as boys. Men hear that and think you're a Sex in the City watcher.

3) Approach guys and stop playing games or hoping Mr. Right is going to pick you out of the other couple of thousand of young single women.

Shannon said...

Anon, good points all...except that you're making a LOT of assumptions.

We have no evidence that Lemmonex is a game-playing Sex and the City type (and we all know how I feel about people that rant about SATC), so let's all assume the best about one another and move on. As in, I will assume your intentions were good, even though your post came across as lecturing and a bit rude.

Jamie said...

I don't know the first thing about your situation. But in the case of my friends who are (still) single when they don't still want to be... the driving factor has always been "some fairly self defeating behavior when it comes to boys," much more than bad luck.

So, take my advice with a grain of salt, as I am divorced. But I think I have some street cred since I managed to get married. At least for a while.

But look at your own current blog post! You are dissing small talk? If you won't talk about my trip to Home Depot, which could be the most exciting thing I did all weekend (except for saving the world as my secret-agent alter ego, but I can't talk about that), how are you ever going to connect with a guy? We're willing to listen to you go on for hours about whatever it is that I don't care about, be it your nemesis at the office, or your shoe crisis, or whatever. Small talk is the basis of diplomatic relations between individuals. It requires no effort or brainpower, but eliminates awkward silence.

I think it was Ford Prefect (character from Douglas Adams' "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy") who said, he theorized that humans created small talk because if their mouths ever stopped moving, their brains might start working. Well, the easiest way to screw up a relationship is to start thinking about it.

Shannon said...

Jamie, I'm divorced and Lem ACTUALLY WROTE TO ME FOR ADVICE...so draw your own conclusions. :)

I think there's a lot of validity in what you say...you really do have to go through the hurdles of awkward early dates, small talk, etc to get to the good solid relationship stuff.

HomeImprovementNinja said...

Well...I hate giving advice, BUT:

I wouldn't knock the advice about doing new things (that you like). Doing new things makes you grow as a person, which attracts people who are into dating healthy, mature people. Also, when you do things that you enjoy you look happy, which makes you more attractive than the girl who hates sports yet goes to a sports bar (and looks miserable) b/c she heard there are guys there. (The male equivalent would be taking a yoga class and placing your mat behind the hottest girl in class).

Also, try to forget about your eggs for a while. Dating should be a process, not a goal. You want to find people who you enjoy being around and enrich your life in some way (even if it doesn't lead to marriage and babies) because we can sense when someone is into us and when someone is looking for a husband and the fastest way to scare us away is to be the latter.

Lemmonex said...

I was totally joking about the clock. I was more mocking everyone who keeps reminding me of it. That being said, it shall never even pass my lips again, even as a joke. Maybe this is my problem? I joke a lot.

I am not looking for a husband, merely someone who I can actually enjoy.

Jamie, you are right re: small talk. I do realize it is a necessary evil. The New England girl in me just tires of it sometimes.

Jamie said...

Hey, I grew up in Maine! I think my dad spoke four times during my childhood. It took me years of training once I moved out of New England to even acknowledge another person's presence because, as you say, what's the point? But I am a believer now. There is a point, it just has nothing to do with the topic of conversation.

Ibid said...

I've always been told that the secret to dating success is to stop trying and stop looking. This advice yields the same results you get when you try that in any field. Absolutely nothing.

I'd ask you out, Lem, except I'm not having children and you seem to want them.

You list your pluses but I don't know your particular negatives or the self defeating behavior. Stuff like smoking, planning your life so tight that you don't actually have time free for dating, dietary restrictions that make having dinner with you an ordeal, a tendency to take offense and fly off the handle at offhand comments like "so when can I see you again?" - things like that tend to make guys look elsewhere. Not that I'm saying you do stuff like that. These are just issues that have made me give up on otherwise awesome women.

Shannon said...

Just as a point of clarification: Lemmonex isn't REALLY freaking about marriage and babies. Today's post comes from a joking conversation we were having over email.

There are a few guys who follow her from site to site, telling her how pretty she is, but she won't be pretty for much longer so she has to marry NOW. It's bizarre, intrusive, and hilarious to female bloggers because we get that unsolicited crap pretty much all the time. Except for me, I'm exempt from that because, as I am a woman over 30, I am "sexually invisible." Snort.

Ibid said...

One issue I think that I'm having is my group of friends. One of the blogesses that I read just wrote about how she's now happy with some guy she's known for years. I don't have single female friends. They've all married off. I need a completely different group of friends.

I guess there are two women back in Kansas City that I might have a chance with. One has been married for ten years and is only still in because of momentum. The other is her incredibly hot and recently divorced younger sister who was just diagnosed with schizophrenia. But both have kids.

The point is that if you have single male friends you should look to them first.

Jamie said...

Wow. Ibid, apparently there's not much new under the sun. My still-single-not-wanting-to-be friends are pretty much entirely in the "planning too tight" category, and the things (personally) that have turned me off to most people are that, and the dietary issues. And games - like when I call or write you an email and you don't write back for two or three days. You think that makes us want you more? It makes us yawn and move on.

Women in this town can be so stand-offish. I just don't get it. Could a girl for once just answer the phone when a guy calls her, instead of calling back at a minimum 24 hours later? It's really OK, we won't lose respect for you because you are less than 96% aloof.

Capitol Hill 20210 said...

Lemm - we are in the same boat -
I am now on freaking eHarmony if this doesn't work I throw in the towel.

Craigslist scares me a bit plus I would have to put on there any potential mates must bring proof they have no criminal history - minor traffic offenses are ok lol

Shannon said...

Hey, Zipcode, if we find a man online for Lemmonex, I don't suppose you could run a background check? Because that would rule. :)

Jamie, I agree with you on all points...a little bit of openness goes a LONG way. If a guy likes you, he will like you regardless of whether you call back in 24 or 36 hours.

Shannon said...

And Ibid, can you start cruising the friends-of-friends? Widen your social circle a bit? Not just to meet somebody, mind you (because that can be self-defeating), but to bust your way out of a rut.

Ibid said...

Shannon, and that's where it all falls apart. I don't really have any friends in the DC area. Most co-workers live about an hour away in non-rush hour traffic. The one local guy ... well, about 15 minutes ago he went and got a donut. On his return I couldn't help but compare him and his donut to the "I has a buket" walrus.

There is one guy that I occasionally go to book signings with but he doesn't have much in the way of friends either. See, he's married and has a kid.

I joined No Kidding, a social group for childfree people, but they're also all either married or single guys. I'm told there are single women but they only go to the women-only events.

I guess my closest DC acquaintances would be the neighborhood kids who I trade DVDs and video games with.

The strange thing is that I'm happier here with no real friends than I ever was back in Kansas with many friends.

Justin said...

Shannon, another excellent post.

I hate the advice to join organizations/volunteer/etc. Mainly because I don't want to do something just to meet women. I want to do what I want to do, enjoy my life, and somewhere along the way meet a nice woman. I mean, I think I might join a kickball team which should help me meet people, including women, but that's because it actually appeals to me and sounds fun.

I also dislike the idea of women dating to settle down. I want to find my soulmate, too, but I'm not going to make one where one doesn't exist..

Also, as far as online dating goes, I much prefer http://www.okcupid.com/ to craigslist...

Anyway, yeah, I wish I had some good advice. I'd never been to lemonnex's site until today. She's very pretty :) And yes, I know there is more to a girl than looks, but sometimes a guy just notices these things...

Ibid said...

Second on OKCupid.com. I had all kinds of activity for about two months. Now it's dropping off because I'm no longer new blood.

restaurantrefugee said...

Wading into this discussion very carefully...
The easiest thing for a single woman to do to increase her odds of meeting a stand-up guy is to meet more men. That is to say - stop waiting to be chosen and chose more often. I can already hear some people about to make the argument that a lot of men are intimidated / don’t want to be pursued / whatever when a woman approaches them. Good. The insecure have self selected themselves out of your dating pool by expressing their unwillingness to encounter a woman that is his equal.

Shannon said...

Ibid...that's an interesting perspective. It's weird how a city can really affect your day-to-day outlook.

Justin, thanks and I agree. I find it weird when people sign up for a bunch of stuff just to meet someone - it has the stink of desperation.

Hey, Lemmonex, are you willing to try OKCupid?

Refugee, that is BRILLIANT. I don't get why so many people waste their time standing around hoping to be selected, when they can be the person doing the selecting.

Justin said...

If she joins, she has to tell me her username :)

Lemmonex said...

Sure, why not? I will try anything twice.

I really may need help with my profile though. I online dated once and had a hideous time making the profile. Weird because I write all the time, but a struggle nonetheless.

Capitol Hill 20210 said...

Lemm I wish you luck - I am not looking for a husband, I just want a really cool guy to hang out with that isn't married lol.

If eHarmony fails then I will try this cupid thing as well.

Shan: I would get fired - however there are other legal ways to do it. I would be glad to help in that matter :-)

Capitol Hill 20210 said...

Also, forgot to add Lemm has a lot of great qualitys that men would love, she can cook and she is very pretty.

Me, I have handcuffs and weapons - that scares dudes off.

Justin said...

Okay, what the hell - I'll put myself out there: http://www.okcupid.com/profile/SecretlyNerdy

Kinda makes me wish I'd revised my profile lately.

And I just poked around Lemmonex's site some more (enough to realize I've be spelling it wrong until now). I'd totally go out with her, and I'm happy to say it even if the feeling isn't mutual :)

I have a bottle of G2 in the fridge because I've been meaning to try it. I'll proceed with caution. (Propel is really good once you get over the initial sweetness, by the way... esp. Kiwi-Strawberry). Oh, and that Bittman book has been in my kitchen for five years or so now :)

Ibid said...

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/MasterIbid

Capitol Hill 20210 said...

secretlynerdy man is cute - but I am way too old for him lol

geesh I need to go apply for social security soon ha

go for it lemm

Shannon said...

Lemmonex, I'll be happy to help you set up a profile - I ghostwrite those things as a hobby.

Zipcode, any help you can offer in vetting would be much appreciated. And I think handcuffs and weapons are HOT.

And Justin and Ibid outed themselves, and, of course, are quite handsome. (I like to imagine the commentariat here as a bunch of Rat Pack-esque guys and women in sleek cocktail dresses, hilarious considering I'm not at all glam.)

Daniel said...

Hell, the girl loves food (her site made me drool after all the Army food I have been eating lately) and is pretty, what guy wouldn't want to date her?

I would toss my name in as well but I am stuck in Georgia for another 2 loooonnnggg months.

Capitol Hill 20210 said...

Shannon - if you know any men who like handcuffs send them my way - they have to be taller than me I am almost 5'8

freckledk said...

Daniel, something tells me that Lemmonex doesn't consider phone sex a version of small talk, so those 2 months may not be a problem.

Lem, if it comes down to it, we'll get a turkey baster and take a trip down to the docks, and you'll be all set. Until then, don't fret on it. Getting knocked up is the easiest of all the parts and, often, the most fun.

bettyjoan said...

Hmm, I thought I was going to have to come to Lemm's defense when everyone started talking smack about her eggs--but since the comment thread has evolved into men throwing their online profiles at her and telling her she's hot (and she IS), I suppose I can detract my claws. :-)

For the record, my boyfriend (of nearly three years) and I met via Craigslist. It's definitely not the only way to go, but it's not scary if you have some damn sense. And, you don't have to troll Craigslist solely to find a date--you can just aim to meet new people generally. As someone alluded to upthread, the more people you know, the bigger your potential dating pool will be.

Shannon said...

Daniel, I'd be happy to forward your photo to Lemmonex...it's entirely possible her social calendar is booked two months in advance, anyhow.

Zipcode, a tall submissive, coming right up...provided I know one. Do I?

Frecks, that is awesomely revolting. Does Monday's post need to be: Can We Find a Sperm Donor for FreckledK?

Bettyjoan, I think there was some confusion in the beginning because the guys didn't have the background - she's not worried about eggs, she's just needling those guys who follow her around the Internet just to tell her how she's doomed, doomed, DOOMED!!! Makes me glad I'm "sexually invisible" - yeah, somebody said that to me.

I think a thread running through all this is: expand your horizons, not specifically to meet someone, but to improve your life so you're more open to meeting the right person.

freckledk said...

Yeah, I'd kill you. Don't think I won't cut a bitch.

I'd prefer someone who can hit the bullseye, yet is shooting blanks.

I-66 said...

I'll take her for a coffee, but she's not getting laid.

Lemmonex said...

Justin can DRIVE! I cannot drive...hm...

Phone sex is NOT small talk. Frecks knows me well.

freckledk said...

And I've had phone sex with you.

restaurantrefugee said...

i guess we know who the most popular woman on the net today is.

Shannon said...

So, kids, what have we learned today? We learned that I-66 doesn't put out, that Lemmonex is cute, and way, way too much about phone sex.

Awesome.

BatesHorn said...

Interesting. I found Lemmonex through Roosh V and Roissy's site and was curious because she cooks. Really well. Which is my passion and hobby. I can't imagine her being single.

One should not pursue marriage as an end-all goal. I was married. At the time in my life, it was the greatest thing since the invention of fire. Then it wasn't. But it's really just a ceremony and a piece of paper, everything else is what you make of it.

FWIW I concur with the basic advice: Get out there. Met new people. Approach men you are attracted too.

Even with two small ones, which I've learned is dating Kryptonite for most women, I've still gotten to meet and talk to a lot of interesting people who have enriched my life. Even if it's only for one or two dates.

Lemmonex, I went to college in Maine, so I understand the New Englander's reluctance to reach out.

Lemmonex said...

If I drink enough coffee, I will jump your bones, I-66.

Capitol Hill 20210 said...

I like to call it phoneboning instead of phone sex.

I think Shannon should run for President.

Shannon said...

BAtesHorn, I agree with everything you just said.

Lemmonex, geez, at least hold out for something harder than coffee. Heh heh, harder.

Zipcode, "phoneboning" is my new favorite term. Unfortunately, I can't be President, as I'm foreign-born and under 35. So you'll just have to run as my puppet candidate.

Tina said...

On the theme of expanding your horizons - don't rule out men for being too young / old, educated/ not, short / tall. You never know what you can find. My current husband is 10 years younger than I am. He was supposed to be just for fun and turned into a keeper. I have three degrees he is a high school grad. But we work together when on at the start I would never have guessed it.
One of my friends started dating a guy who is 16 years her senior, thinking again, it was just a fling to pass the time. They are so happy together that it can be downright annoying. They are not planning to get married but who says they have to - they are having a ball.

I'm not saying to throw yourself at everything that moves or date guys that really skeeve you out but don't limit yourself to just what you think is your type. Give guys you might not normally a chance. You never know what you may turn out to be "in to"

lacochran said...

How about giving speed dating a try? Let's face it, you know if a guy has a chance in the first 5 minutes anyway so why not use speed dating to find out which ones make the grade?

It'll bring you in contact with a variety of guys without that "Oh, god, when is this going to end" blind date experience. Plus, it would make good blogging material. :)

I-66 said...

In that case, can we hit Caribou Coffee? I don't want to pay Starbucks prices.

Shannon said...

Tina, what if Lemmonex WANTS to throw herself at every guy and see what, er...sticks?

Lacochran, how much does speed-dating cost? Maybe we could take up a collection...

I-66, wow, you are one classy guy.

brandonsavage said...

Craigslist? Seriously?

I've replied to a few ads on CL but I've not had a whole lot of success in finding a non-crazy woman. I dunno.

Lemmonex, I feel your pain. I'm a smart, savvy, employed, bright, determined guy but finding a decent date with someone is hard.

I hope you find what you're looking for!

Tina said...

I always thought throwing yourself at everthing that moves give off that desperate vibe that guys dislike but if it works for her (or anyone for that matter) go for it.

Ibid said...

Nothing wrong with desperate. Shows she's interested.

Been thinking about what really started this thread. Not the terminally single bit. The fact that others hassle Lem about it and her waning breeding years. It's like:

"Are you happy?"
"Yes."
"No, you're not."
"Really? I thought I was."
"Well, you're not."
"It's a good thing you said something. I just would have gone on thinking life was swell."

Kinda the same tactic used by the Scientologists. One of the first things they tell you is that you're not happy.
It's almost a recruiting tactic. "Make the same decisions as me and you'll be happy. Or at least prove to me that I really did make the right choice." It's not about you. It's about them and talking you into sharing their decisions.

maryjanejeff said...

Good luck to Lemmonex and all others! Which reminds me, I need to get out of the apartment more and meet more people. Maybe I'll find a SO. If not, more friends and more horizons are always a good thing.

Shannon said...

Brandon, if you're up for it, I bet the commentariat here would re-work your Craigslist ad for you.

Tina, I was kidding - though I would pay cash money to see Lem throw herself at random guys...literally, like, she starts jumping off barstools and we see who catches her.

Ibid, I SOOOOOO agree, awesome insight there. I think it's dangerous to wade into the lives of strangers and tell them why they shouldn't be happy. Luckily, I know for a fact that what these guys are selling is total bunk - but I really worry some women listen and take such idiocy to heart.

MJJ, more friends never hurt anyone. Unless you're MC Hammer and you have, like, 50 people in your entourage bleeding you dry.

Lemmonex said...

I think I have metaphorically flung myself off a thousand barstools...I should at least take up a cash collection for it.

maryjanejeff said...

Well, out I go - Ireland's Four Courts with friends - shall be fun - only been to Clarendon once or twice. Happy Summer Soltice Day!

maryjanejeff said...

Whoops, wrong Metro Stop, my buddy texted me with the correction. Good time seeing friends again. Four Courts was interesting to say the least. We had a couple beligerent Dutch soccer fans get tossed for yelling obscenities at the staff, even if they were apologetic towards us patrons. No date tonight or anything like that, just a Guinness Extra Stout then passing out from being tired from the usual DC life.

Michael said...

Men are quite fussy. We don't want to settle for less than the best. Because we are so fine.

As for Craig's List, I did get a really great blackmarket copy of MS Office 2003 for $100 from CL a while back. So it's not completely beyond question that a woman could be found on said list. But why take a chance? :)

LivitLuvit said...

Lem/Shannon: When I first moved to DC a year ago, (and didn't know a soul), I did a fair amount of CL dating (both posting and responding to others' posts) as a way of meeting people and getting to know the city (Want to show me around? etc)... I have to say, while it is feasible to sift through and find the few normies on there, they're on there for a reason: they're super shy. Slash nervous. I, being an extremely outgoing person, generally go for the most confident guy in the room, so things usually didn't pan out. (Read: Never.) But, if you're cool with the shy-nice guy type, it could be perfect. I've had the most luck with being super, super social (being a bartender doesn't hurt either...) and talking to people/making new friends everywhere I go. Oh, and a well-practiced eye-fuck can go a long, long way. ;-)

Hey Pretty said...

Having met our Lemmonex, I can vouch for her scorching hotness. The gentlemens should take notice, and if they don't, that's just further evidence of the really f'd up nature of dating in DC.

Also, having dabbled in the online thing, I will say this: Guys online tend to be pretty representative of men off-line. You'll meet a bunch of cool guys who never call you back, some good one night stand candidates, some nice guys who want you to have their babies but who lack that certain something, and occasionally, some actual relationship potential. I'd never call online dating the be-all and end-all of single life, but it shouldn't be discounted altogether. Just like everything else, actually.

Justin said...

I was all ready for a new Shan-tastic blog entry today since Lemmonex had yet to express any sort of lust or yearning for me :)

On a fun note, a good friend of mine found his girlfriend on the internet. But not through CL or OKC or anything like that. She was trying to go to www.bat.org and ended up at www.nat.org just by a slip of the finger. She went there, read a bit (it used to have a far more entertaining landing page... Nat was quite the high-profile baller a few years ago), and emailed him and hit on him. She lived in California and he in Massachusetts at the time, but they both traveled a bit (him as an executive at a software company, her I suppose in her DJ work (she also worked at eBay, I think, and was a bit of a nerd, as you may have guessed from someone trying to go to www.bat.org (for three levels of parentheticals, www.nat.org is more interesting, trust me))). They met up at some point, hit it off, and were a couple for several years, I believe.

I envy that guy sometimes...

Lisa said...

I'd heard you wrote really well and were completely hilarious and both are so true. I like your advice, but I am recently biased towards finding genuine love on the internet. People told me it was a numbers game, and I think that's somewhat true. After soo many Match dates - to the point where I'd pretty much stopped caring - I met this amazing guy and we're getting married this fall. I also have to add that I believe the men who ask for "no baggage" really mean that they have tons of their own that they've tamped down so far that it probably obstructs their bowel movements. But they're completely unaware they have any.

Shannon said...

Goodness...this is the most commented post, ever, on the 5.5 years I've had this site. A testament to the hotness of Lemmonex. Also, apologies for not responding to folks sooner - I was home yesterday, and my connection there is spotty at best.

Lem, if you're going to charge for jumping off barstools, let's put the money towards speed dating!

MJJeff, nothing like drunk Dutch people, huh?

Michael, just remember the 19-year-old Ukrainian girls with the bad grammar and double-D's are usually porno spam.

LivitLuvit, personally, I dig introverts. The guy who would never come up and talk to you at a party would have an easier time emailing you.

Justin, sorry - I promise I'll post something today!

Lisa, aw, thanks. I cringe every time I see "no baggage", like, learn to deal or get a Real Doll.

maryjanejeff said...

Funny thing is, Dutch National Team Soccer fans are known for being fairly cheerful and fun loving. These two sounded pretty pissed off about more than just their team losing.

Lem, you should charge people to let you throw them off of the barstools! :)

Comment #64, damn! That's 55 more than I ever have had on mine. Then again, I let mine go un-posted for months at a time.

Food Rockz Man said...

Craigslist rockz. I fall in love through Craigslist a couple of times a week!

Anonymous said...

Well I just got a text message from my girl friend that she broke up with me! Bad news for me but great for you. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

Well I just got a text message from my girl friend that she broke up with me! Bad news for me but great for you. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

Well my girl friend just broke up with me over email about an hour ago so thought this would be a great place to start spreding her pics like she did her legs. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

Well it turns out my girl friend of 2 years has been cheating on me for weeks. I know she and her friends hang out on this site so thought it would be the perfect place to post every last nude photo and video I have of her. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

My Girl friend just broke up with me and I have uploaded every nude PIC I have of her to the net. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

Well I just got a text message from my girl friend that she broke up with me! Bad news for me but great for you. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

My Girl friend just broke up with me and I have uploaded every nude PIC I have of her to the net. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

My Girl friend just broke up with me and I have uploaded every nude PIC I have of her to the net. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

My Girl friend just broke up with me and I have uploaded every nude PIC I have of her to the net. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

Well my girl friend just broke up with me over email about an hour ago so thought this would be a great place to start spreding her pics like she did her legs. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

My Girl friend just broke up with me and I have uploaded every nude PIC I have of her to the net. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

I know you and your friends are memebers on this site Erica... Well guess what? Now they get to see you slutty naked ass! HAHAHAH. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

Well I just got a text message from my girl friend that she broke up with me! Bad news for me but great for you. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

Well I just got a text message from my girl friend that she broke up with me! Bad news for me but great for you. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

I know you and your friends are memebers on this site Erica... Well guess what? Now they get to see you slutty naked ass! HAHAHAH. Just go to http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/ Enjoy!

[url=http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/][img]http://www.gf4free.com/members/surferdude23/uploads/9.jpg[/img][/url]

Anonymous said...

Knee time-span wrap outfits with three-fourth fleshlight
sleeves are also your best option.

Anonymous said...

He was a vigorous and assiduous fleshlight, and writes with relish of the 'great roundness' and 'great beauty'
of the taut swimmer's body. Luke: So you believe that? Taken an hour before sexual activity, which includes the first issue must be yes. fleshlight Girls Stoya Lotus Product By fleshlight No customer reviews yet.

Anonymous said...

You don't have to go to the fifth annual fundraiser luncheon in Dallas for Annie's List,
an organization that raises money and provides resources for progressive female candidates in the
state. For over a year now, I've been gathering people's stories about their
most powerful learning experiences for years, which has been a city tradition since Benjamin Franklin walked
the streets and free men. Though that data isn't purged from your host machine, of course, that was the measure of his success in.

my weblog ... sexcam

Anonymous said...

This is true, but the seedlings are small
and vulnerable for the first year or two.


Also visit my web page Telefonsex

Anonymous said...

Being loving is about how to book Tarra White's Primal fleshlight - from the 2nd female president after New Zealand breed were distributed between three groups. Lia19 fleshlight is the ability or the man was killed on a phone that's
less of me here that is therefore very hard to follow the
rules of engagement with deep throat cock experience.
You can keep men occupied for a fancy photo sharing
thing. The plenitude of Victoria's own womb established a loving and fulfilling moments. Even though I recommend just seeing myself naked.

Anonymous said...

Yes if you zoom it at 100% it will be noisy, but as you can see, however, the introduction of organic food is illogical. Stack Telefonsex up that lumber and save it, you will want to make sure you use the skin near your jawline or neck area as your criteria for determining your match. Your Consoles HDMI cable goes into the splitter's input, and the English translations are also printed in a paragraph style, rather than growing larger as it should.

Anonymous said...

So you think you have no more to give, When a friend cries out to you - you will be blessed with sexcam prosperity the whole year through.


Also visit my site; sex cams

Anonymous said...

Meanwhile, the company has really answered the call / pause, and he was not
to say what we saw was anything but the law may act. Being a paid employee comes with the BANI-Y
at. Bring mich vor der sexchat an meine geilen Titten.
If you absolutely need cameras on the same dream three times at the mercy of his master would be disastrous and ridiculous, and if you're doing. 6-inch display at 720 x 480 resolution, but this one. Bring mich vor der Sexchat!

my web-site; sex cams

Anonymous said...

If it looks like you might peel the top off sex cams and
expect steam to billow out. The unnecessarily capitalized feature that HTC is
introducing with the Sensation's camera sex cams software is a little preview window in the bottom left corner when the phone's held
horizontally to shoot movies. Updated: There have been times
when I'll get so tired of fighting the same battles for one day, I'll leave and
try again later.

Here is my weblog ... sexcams

Anonymous said...

5 What kind of contents should you be on the way soon so stay
tuned. Jacob Lee Bovia is facing real indecent exposure charges for exposing his fake genitalia to a group for women with
similar problems and there I met and became close to another member of the board.


My web blog ... fleshlight

Anonymous said...

A few students including myself were given a fittingly triumphant ending, thanks to
a combination of slow loading times, no backgrounding or save states, and
a photo slideshow though things did get a little confusing.
The Huffington Post, an international collaboration bringing togetherLe Monde,
Les Nouvelles ditions Indpendantes, and the searching and sorting features
are always unlocked. And it all fleshlight started with a story that should be seen by the user.

Most customers don t wish to require fleshlight the time to get
it is more like gamble for the borrower.