This week's tale of goofy youth is in honor of the Capital Pride Festival, which runs through Sunday. I'll be checking out the street fair and (hopefully) the poetry reading at Busboys and Poets, Sunday at 4:00. My amazing friend Sean will be reading one of his poems, you should go check it out!
So, back to the story. It's the dawn of the 90s. My sister is a junior in high school, I'm a freshman. I'm upstairs, watching Hey Dude on Nickelodeon. I hear a commotion downstairs, but go back to watching TV. Then I hear a clomp-clomp-clomp sound, coming up the stairs (one of the awesome things about being a teen in the early 90s is that the shoes were way clonky, which lent an awesome percussion to teenage tantrums).
My sister storms in, and explains the kerfuffle: she just told Mom that she's a lesbian.
I turn to her, say, "Well, that explains the poor fashion sense," and go back to watching Hey Dude.
And that's why, when weighing the pros and cons of coming out of the closet, a huge con should be: "I might have to come out to a 14-year-old girl."
Happy Pride, Skye!
So, back to the story. It's the dawn of the 90s. My sister is a junior in high school, I'm a freshman. I'm upstairs, watching Hey Dude on Nickelodeon. I hear a commotion downstairs, but go back to watching TV. Then I hear a clomp-clomp-clomp sound, coming up the stairs (one of the awesome things about being a teen in the early 90s is that the shoes were way clonky, which lent an awesome percussion to teenage tantrums).
My sister storms in, and explains the kerfuffle: she just told Mom that she's a lesbian.
I turn to her, say, "Well, that explains the poor fashion sense," and go back to watching Hey Dude.
And that's why, when weighing the pros and cons of coming out of the closet, a huge con should be: "I might have to come out to a 14-year-old girl."
Happy Pride, Skye!
And, awesomely, Skye has joined the comments...
7 comments:
Oh, that's awesome. I hope Skye tortured you when you were growing up - you clearly deserved it.
Capital Pride Festival. Is this the event where the really militant lesbians walk around the Dupont Circle area topless?
I think I know where my birdy and I will be spending the weekend.
K: Totally. The funny thing was, even though she was two years older and about four inches taller, she didn't torment me too much. I was way meaner - I used to tell her she was named after the kind of terrier.
Ibid: I think Topless Militant Lesbians opened for Me and My Birdy.
Oh man, I saw the big rainbow flag up top of your blog and I was like, "crap, she's going to tell that story joking my fashion sense."
I would like to say I have progressed from then, fashion-wise, but that would be a lie. I just have my friends dress me.
The highlight of last year's shopping expedition took place in the shoe store in Nordstrom's. The others posited that I might need heels to go with my suit. I objected, and they nodded knowingly, saying it was likely I couldn't walk in them anyhow. Indignant, I had a pair brought out, put them on, and proceeded to bound in a circle in the store, then stop and deliver two roundhouse kicks. Take that, stereotypes! (I learned it by watching Charlie's Angels.)
Skye, hey! I could just as easily be celebrating diversity.
I like, "last year's shopping expedition," because Skye's shopping pretty much happens once a year. I seem to recall an annual shop where Skye frolicked about the Esprit Outlet at Potomac Mills, performing a tune of her own devising, called, "This is where the little leprechauns buy their clothes!" Then she demanded my pot of gold.
Pride festivities always remind me of this part of my favorite Margaret Cho special:
So since I was about 10 years old almost all of my friends have been gay men. And my mother would give me phone messages from then when they would call me when I lived at home. �Ummm . . . Scott called . . .Is he the GAY?!� �Well God mom, I don�t know if he�s THE gay. That�s a lot of pressure to be THE gay. All that resting on one guy. He has to do the parade ALL BY HIMSELF. �I�m here, I�m queer . . . well, I guess I�m the only one!�
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