Thursday, March 13, 2008

So What's Up With the Sexy Secretaries?

In the ongoing, but often-dropped, redesign of this site, I ran a search on Google Images. I was trying to find some sort of secretary graphic. Instead, I found page after page of exposed bras and pretty young ladies draping themselves across Dictaphones and typewriters.

Thanks, Google! I'm glad to know that my job is such a turn-on for you. The pay isn't great, so it's good to be compensated in hotness.

Last night, I cornered Tim into discussing occupational fetishes. Here's what we came up with: Men have the hots for secretaries because we're conveniently located (the desk right outside your office!). Librarians and teachers are hot because they're dominant, and either one might suddenly take off her glasses and shake out her hair to a thumping bass beat. Nurses are sexy because they're in a service profession and they see you naked.

The hot guy professions seem to be centered around uniforms: cop, fireman, military, etc. Is the "man in uniform" thing simply because there are so many guys out there who can't dress themselves? And I don't know any woman who is turned on by plumbers or pizza boys, so why do male strippers dress up as plumbers and pizza boys? And what's up with the milkman thing? I don't think anyone's seen a real milkman in decades.

Creative professions are hot to both sexes: musicians (guilty as charged), artists, writers, actors and actresses.

What occupations do you think are hot? Do you work in a sexy profession? If so, did you plan it that way?

PS - the image is of "Secretary Barbie." I'm envious of her full-length bangs and her ability to wear yellow without looking like a corpse.


Jo said...

Musicians are my weakness, for sure. Nothing like greasy hair, a guitar and a depressed expression to get me all turned on.

Michael J. West said...

Man! Your image searches are always so much more interesting than mine! (Although I suppose I could turn off my SFW filters). I also remember your ill-fated search for a Mardi Gras picture.

Well, you said that writers are sexy, so I guess I'm in a sexy job...although I write about jazz and Communication scholarship, which may mitigate.

Shannon said...

Jo, with you on the musician thing. Probably because I love music but have zero talent for it.

Mike, I will never figure out why Google thinks I'm such a pervo. I search for Mardi Gras graphics, I get boobies. I search for secretaries, I get more boobies. Nothin' but boobies. And jazz writers are HOT.

Kristen S. said...

Yeah, my profession is totally sexy - webmaster! HAWT! :)

I think firemen are the sexiest beasts alive. It's not only the uniform, but you need to be physically strong to do the job, and since the pay ain't that great, I can guess that most of them are in it to help people & do something exciting for a living.

Lumberjack is also sexy to me, but I don't like the idea of cutting down all those trees.

Shannon said...

I bet there's a ton of Webmistress of the Night porn out there!

Firemen, dig the macho boys, huh?

Kristen S. said...

Yep...I think it's because I'm an Amazonian tomboy who loves NASCAR & fishin & other rednecky pursuits. I need an uber-guy guy to feel at least slightly feminine ;)

Arjewtino said...

Definitely all of the above. Plus flight attendants. They serve you drinks, make sure you have a pillow, and put their asses just inches from your face.

Shannon said...

Kristen, I am going to make it the mission of this blog to find you a fireman who lumberjacks on the weekends.

Arjewtino, I forgot all about flight attendants! I always thought it was "Marry me, fly for free" that was the big turn-on. Or the fact that "layover" sounds like a dirty word.

Which reminds me of a post I'm working on...

Kristen S. said...

Yeah for Shannon!! :D

Justin said...

Librarians. It's the glasses. Seriously. And I never thought about the position of authority thing, either, but that's kinda nice too. Plus, it would be hot if they went from hair-up to hair down to a thumping bass beat.

I should keep my strip club virginity alive. I'd just be easy pickins, wouldn't I?