tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post6867622436030716947..comments2024-03-27T09:05:25.928+00:00Comments on Disaffected Scanner Jockey: A Tuesday Travelogue, TSA EditionShannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16089796721473561446noreply@blogger.comBlogger28125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-37916684295505234742008-10-22T14:47:00.000+01:002008-10-22T14:47:00.000+01:00"An econo-pack of condoms and a Magic 8-Ball"? Ge..."An econo-pack of condoms and a Magic 8-Ball"? Genius! If I get arrested next time I fly, it'll be your fault...Bilbohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14213505386288233192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-77033810075810134032008-10-21T22:20:00.000+01:002008-10-21T22:20:00.000+01:00I'm being forced to tag you by Zipcode. I'm sorry...I'm being forced to tag you by Zipcode. I'm sorry.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-47278795456379107662008-10-21T22:06:00.000+01:002008-10-21T22:06:00.000+01:00Refugee - Just so long as there were no body cavit...Refugee - Just so long as there were no body cavity searches...<BR/><BR/>Zip - Nah, I make more money as a secretary.<BR/><BR/>Foggy - My bag is the one covered in cat vomit. Care to inspect it?Shannonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16089796721473561446noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-57988600306372480342008-10-21T22:01:00.000+01:002008-10-21T22:01:00.000+01:00This was pre-9/11, but in '99 I was coming back fr...This was pre-9/11, but in '99 I was coming back from from a two week shoot-ex at Twentynine Palms with a group of Marines including the deputy commanding general of the 2nd Marine Division. We got to LAX, loaded all our bags on a cart and went in to the ticket counter. <BR/><BR/>When we got through with all the ID stuff at the counter the ticket agent told me my bag was selected for further inspection. I told her fine, it's the red one on the bottom beneath 10 or 12 seabags and she was welcome to go through it (although I was a little worried it might be covered in explosive and gunshot residue due to the two weeks in the field).<BR/><BR/>She took one look and and said, "You're done. Have a nice flight."<BR/><BR/>Too bad we have to do all the heavy lifting now.FoggyDewhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07934197854661226301noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-145874535206799632008-10-21T21:53:00.000+01:002008-10-21T21:53:00.000+01:00vvk: I like your use of swagshannon: have you eve...vvk: I like your use of swag<BR/>shannon: have you ever though of a career as a comedian :-)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-83635250290011267582008-10-21T21:50:00.000+01:002008-10-21T21:50:00.000+01:00Shortly after 9/11 I had to take a last minute fli...Shortly after 9/11 I had to take a last minute flight to Atlanta for a work thingy. It was so last minute that I had my assistant go to my house to pack a bag for me to ship later. Random guy on a one-way ticket and without luggage, I spent two blissful hours enjoying the company of TSA or whatever they were called at that time. Since I then missed my flight, my bag got to Atlanta before I did.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-55969500671584337452008-10-21T21:24:00.000+01:002008-10-21T21:24:00.000+01:00Zip - When I fly, I have to stop the gate attendan...Zip - When I fly, I have to stop the gate attendants from making me wear one of those "Child Travelling Alone" stickers.<BR/><BR/>VVK - I wonder what would happen if you wore, say, HUD swag.Shannonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16089796721473561446noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-21064870982121408122008-10-21T21:22:00.000+01:002008-10-21T21:22:00.000+01:00I wish the "college kid with a funny tshirt" thing...I wish the "college kid with a funny tshirt" thing worked for me... but I don't think they look too far past "big" and "brown"... also, I don't work at DHS, I just wear their swag. :-)vvkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03734548705832479139noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-80105596771414184412008-10-21T21:04:00.000+01:002008-10-21T21:04:00.000+01:002 badges coming right up! fake ones that is.........2 badges coming right up! fake ones that is..........<BR/><BR/>I don't wear anything identifying who I work for when I fly - that just calls out "Please attack and kill me first" if something happens. I like to blend in - I look like a college kid with a funny tshirt when I fly.Capitol Hill 20210https://www.blogger.com/profile/14728522554591134160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-10655026244000514292008-10-21T20:58:00.000+01:002008-10-21T20:58:00.000+01:00VVK - agreed. I'm a pocket-size white girl, so I g...VVK - agreed. I'm a pocket-size white girl, so I get away with a great deal more than most people would.Shannonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16089796721473561446noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-55116939112231619952008-10-21T20:50:00.000+01:002008-10-21T20:50:00.000+01:00How much fun you can have with the TSA depends on ...How much fun you can have with the TSA depends on who you are. As a big brown guy, I have to be very very very deferential. I went for a record 24-odd flights in a row post 9/11 where I was "randomly" selected for extra screening... only rarely by the computer.<BR/><BR/>Now-a-days I (1) use my work id/hall pass when I fly, and (2) wear a DHS t-shirt or sweatshirt. This has reduced my screening rate to ~one out of four flights.vvkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03734548705832479139noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-89235436780892880272008-10-21T20:38:00.000+01:002008-10-21T20:38:00.000+01:00Zip - You know I totally want one, and would wear ...Zip - You know I totally want one, and would wear it every day.<BR/><BR/>Tina - That would be the ultimate in Unlikely Sexy Skin-o-Ween costumes.Shannonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16089796721473561446noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-70862909109989955462008-10-21T20:33:00.000+01:002008-10-21T20:33:00.000+01:00I want a junior agent badge!!! I can then go as a...I want a junior agent badge!!! I can then go as a sexy underwire bra hijacking terrorist impersonating a federal agent for halloween. How awsome would that be?Tinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16028778070561332377noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-54136958073508560382008-10-21T19:55:00.000+01:002008-10-21T19:55:00.000+01:00I can get your a Junior Agent badge if you really ...I can get your a Junior Agent badge if you really want one...........lolCapitol Hill 20210https://www.blogger.com/profile/14728522554591134160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-32368222437245212002008-10-21T19:46:00.001+01:002008-10-21T19:46:00.001+01:00Jack - I'm more lukewarm, and after a week on the ...Jack - I'm more lukewarm, and after a week on the road, I was pretty well cold.<BR/><BR/>Zip - Thanks for clearing that up. More importantly, when do I get a badge?Shannonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16089796721473561446noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-35888728157738455852008-10-21T19:46:00.000+01:002008-10-21T19:46:00.000+01:00This is a sample job annoucement:http://jobsearch....This is a sample job annoucement:<BR/>http://jobsearch.usajobs.gov/getjob.asp?JobID=68078732&AVSDM=2008%2D09%2D22+13%3A38%3A18&Logo=0&sort=rv&vw=d&brd=3876&ss=0&customapplicant=15513,15514,15515,15669,15523,15512,15516,45575&q=Screener<BR/><BR/>This is a federal agent:<BR/>http://jobsearch.usajobs.gov/getjob.asp?JobID=76359308&AVSDM=2008%2D10%2D10+08%3A01%3A45&Logo=0&q=Special+Agent&sort=rv&vw=d&brd=3876&ss=0&customapplicant=15513,15514,15515,15669,15523,15512,15516,45575Capitol Hill 20210https://www.blogger.com/profile/14728522554591134160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-84903274971267377872008-10-21T19:44:00.000+01:002008-10-21T19:44:00.000+01:00Lance - they are not Federal Agents - no no no - t...Lance - they are not Federal Agents - no no no - they are screeners, nothing more, nothing less, all of us in the federal law enforcement family are not happy they got badges, because I am sure inpersonation will happen.Capitol Hill 20210https://www.blogger.com/profile/14728522554591134160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-81045144820210804902008-10-21T19:22:00.000+01:002008-10-21T19:22:00.000+01:00I have a feeling that lesson is hot-chick-specific...I have a feeling that lesson is hot-chick-specific. I might end up in guantanamo if I ever had the balls to do that.<BR/><BR/>J<BR/><BR/>http://adventuresinvoluntarysimplicity.blogspot.com/Jackhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11140071411706781433noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-4649129328206350132008-10-21T19:04:00.000+01:002008-10-21T19:04:00.000+01:00Frecks - Don't we all?Tina - Victoria is a terrori...Frecks - Don't we all?<BR/><BR/>Tina - Victoria is a terrorist? I just thought she made lousy-fitting bras.<BR/><BR/>Zip - I think the miasma of beer I was giving off mellowed them considerably.<BR/><BR/>Lance - Food inspectors, maybe? Are they federal agents?Shannonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16089796721473561446noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-58087659770399906072008-10-21T18:58:00.000+01:002008-10-21T18:58:00.000+01:00it's fairly ridiculous that TSA baggage screeners ...it's fairly ridiculous that TSA baggage screeners are now 'federal agents'. is there a more ridiculous job that has that title?Lancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01718427886995028941noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-6433893630231126942008-10-21T18:46:00.000+01:002008-10-21T18:46:00.000+01:00My only advice the new TSA folks with the fancy bl...My only advice the new TSA folks with the fancy blue shirts and shiney golden badges seem to think they have more power now - which they don't - so those guys I wouldn't mess with - they will make you miss your flight.<BR/><BR/>Shannons story is funny though.Capitol Hill 20210https://www.blogger.com/profile/14728522554591134160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-15576952588859432392008-10-21T18:44:00.001+01:002008-10-21T18:44:00.001+01:00My only fun with the TSA folks was when - right af...My only fun with the TSA folks was when - right after they got started - a kid looking about 12 couldn't seem to fathom why passing the wand over my breasts was causing the metal detector to go off. "I'm wearing and underwire bra sweetie" I told him. Poor kid was mortified. <BR/><BR/>But they were hyper enough then that they made me go to the ladies room and remove the bra for x ray. Now you know victoria's secret - she's helping me hijack planes.Tinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16028778070561332377noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-1303290054055266712008-10-21T18:44:00.000+01:002008-10-21T18:44:00.000+01:00My only fun with the TSA folks was when - right af...My only fun with the TSA folks was when - right after they got started - a kid looking about 12 couldn't seem to fathom why passing the wand over my breasts was causing the metal detector to go off. "I'm wearing and underwire bra sweetie" I told him. Poor kid was mortified. <BR/><BR/>But they were hyper enough then that they made me go to the ladies room and remove the bra for x ray. Now you know victoria's secret - she's helping me hijack planes.Tinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16028778070561332377noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-71340169290751693232008-10-21T18:21:00.000+01:002008-10-21T18:21:00.000+01:00I will refrain from commenting on this one ;-)I will refrain from commenting on this one ;-)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4056861.post-47399050364066481852008-10-21T18:02:00.000+01:002008-10-21T18:02:00.000+01:00"Nowadays I travel with an econo-pack of condoms a..."Nowadays I travel with an econo-pack of condoms and a Magic 8-ball."<BR/><BR/>You too?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com